Dear men who watch pornography,
First of all, I know that both genders watch pornography, I just want to address this letter to the men specifically as the opposite gender pleading for change. I understand the power of addiction. You become trapped. It is difficult to stop looking as you have withdrawals. The only way to feel relief is to look at pornography. You feel that immediate escape and "happiness". The sad thing is this happiness is temporary and you need to look at pornography longer to get the same feeling you had before. I understand that addictions can overtake your life.
I want you to know that your actions are affecting you, your immediate family and friends and society. I want to write about how your decisions are affecting me personally. I may not know you, but your decisions are still affecting me. There is this thing called objectifying women. It is happening all the time in society now. The pornography industry thrives off of objectifying women. I have never watched pornography, but I know the messages that they send. There are some that include violence and some not. Whether or not it includes violence, the message that women are a object is common in all pornography.
I am not a object. I want to say that clearly. I never want to be treated like a object. Just because the videos and pictures may portray me as a object, that doesn't mean that I deserve to be treated that way. I want to be treated with respect.
With regards to dating, I want to be courted. Is that too much to ask? Remember the day, when boys actually called you on the phone and were gentlemen? I believe that courting has disappeared partly because of pornography. Men don't know how to treat women with respect and courtesy because they view them on the computer screen. I am not that girl on the computer screen. In order to woo me, there must be more involved than taking clothes off and looking at me lustfully.
Please understand the difference between lust and real love. Real love takes commitment, time and work. All of these components are not included in pornography. Pornography is lustful. There is no commitment. You can look at a picture or video of one girl. You can become bored and switch. You can leave at anytime. Relationships are work. They take a lot of emotional involvement. They are rewarding and scary. You can be rejected or loved back. The fear of rejection is taken away in pornography as the girl on the computer screen always says yes. I will not always say yes. I may reject you. That is a part of life, but the beautiful part is that we learn from it and everything works out in the end. So, get off the computer and try to find real love. The girl on the computer screen can't give you her heart. I can offer you my heart. My heart is real. Do you want a picture or a chance for real love?
I know that addiction recovery is difficult. Think of your current or future family. What do you want your kids to think of you? What do you want your girlfriend/wife to think of you? Is it worth it to lose touch of reality and become encompassed about pictures of other grirls bodies?
I am going to answer my own question and say that it is not worth it. Don't give in to that click on the computer screen. I don't know your motivation for looking at pornography. But, try to give it up. Seek help if you need it. Seek help sooner than later.
Please try to give up this addiction. I know that it may seem harmless, but I know that there are immediate and eternal consequences from viewing pornography. Don't become trapped. Don't you want to experience freedom? And don't believe that when you are watching pornography, you are experiencing happiness. Happiness comes from real relationships that are off a computer screen. Happiness comes from love that takes time. Happiness comes from knowing someone inside and out.
Find help if you need it. The best thing you can do is it completely avoid pornography like the plauge. If that doesn't happen, find help. Do all you can to get rid of the filth in your life. It isn't worth it. I don't want to sound rude in this letter. I just want to let you know the serious consequences of pornography. I want you to know that there is hope. When you are feeling discouraged, know that there are so many people rooting for your recovery. I am rooting for your recovery from addiction. I want you to be happy and free from addiction. I know that you can do it. I have faith that recovery is possible. I have faith that there is a way to overcome it. It may not the easy route, but it is the route that will bring you back to freedom and happiness. Don't give up when you are on the pathway to recovery. If no one else is rooting for you, know a random stranger is cheering you on as you try to gain back from your freedom.
Sincerely,
A girl desiring change.
I want you to know that your actions are affecting you, your immediate family and friends and society. I want to write about how your decisions are affecting me personally. I may not know you, but your decisions are still affecting me. There is this thing called objectifying women. It is happening all the time in society now. The pornography industry thrives off of objectifying women. I have never watched pornography, but I know the messages that they send. There are some that include violence and some not. Whether or not it includes violence, the message that women are a object is common in all pornography.
I am not a object. I want to say that clearly. I never want to be treated like a object. Just because the videos and pictures may portray me as a object, that doesn't mean that I deserve to be treated that way. I want to be treated with respect.
With regards to dating, I want to be courted. Is that too much to ask? Remember the day, when boys actually called you on the phone and were gentlemen? I believe that courting has disappeared partly because of pornography. Men don't know how to treat women with respect and courtesy because they view them on the computer screen. I am not that girl on the computer screen. In order to woo me, there must be more involved than taking clothes off and looking at me lustfully.
Please understand the difference between lust and real love. Real love takes commitment, time and work. All of these components are not included in pornography. Pornography is lustful. There is no commitment. You can look at a picture or video of one girl. You can become bored and switch. You can leave at anytime. Relationships are work. They take a lot of emotional involvement. They are rewarding and scary. You can be rejected or loved back. The fear of rejection is taken away in pornography as the girl on the computer screen always says yes. I will not always say yes. I may reject you. That is a part of life, but the beautiful part is that we learn from it and everything works out in the end. So, get off the computer and try to find real love. The girl on the computer screen can't give you her heart. I can offer you my heart. My heart is real. Do you want a picture or a chance for real love?
I know that addiction recovery is difficult. Think of your current or future family. What do you want your kids to think of you? What do you want your girlfriend/wife to think of you? Is it worth it to lose touch of reality and become encompassed about pictures of other grirls bodies?
I am going to answer my own question and say that it is not worth it. Don't give in to that click on the computer screen. I don't know your motivation for looking at pornography. But, try to give it up. Seek help if you need it. Seek help sooner than later.
Please try to give up this addiction. I know that it may seem harmless, but I know that there are immediate and eternal consequences from viewing pornography. Don't become trapped. Don't you want to experience freedom? And don't believe that when you are watching pornography, you are experiencing happiness. Happiness comes from real relationships that are off a computer screen. Happiness comes from love that takes time. Happiness comes from knowing someone inside and out.
Find help if you need it. The best thing you can do is it completely avoid pornography like the plauge. If that doesn't happen, find help. Do all you can to get rid of the filth in your life. It isn't worth it. I don't want to sound rude in this letter. I just want to let you know the serious consequences of pornography. I want you to know that there is hope. When you are feeling discouraged, know that there are so many people rooting for your recovery. I am rooting for your recovery from addiction. I want you to be happy and free from addiction. I know that you can do it. I have faith that recovery is possible. I have faith that there is a way to overcome it. It may not the easy route, but it is the route that will bring you back to freedom and happiness. Don't give up when you are on the pathway to recovery. If no one else is rooting for you, know a random stranger is cheering you on as you try to gain back from your freedom.
Sincerely,
A girl desiring change.
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